Oh, my baby!

I've been meaning to get a new pair of sports shoe for floorball.
The current one has worn out real bad and I've told myself not to get the Nike-Futsal type of shoe again.
Reason being, the sole's too thin and it wears out incredibly fast.
Thus, I decided to try out something new aside from the usual brands like Nike and Adidas...
And guess what...
I just came back from QueensBay and I got this...

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A pair of Asics!

Yes, I'm grinning from ear to ear.
My brand new baby...
It's unbelievably comfortable and it's as light as a feather!
Plusssssss... I got it with a 20% discount!!!!
Man, it was worth the money.

APAC... Here I come! Woo hoooooo!

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Is this my time?

From getting whooped to getting a second chance...
What an interesting week.
:)

I'll update about that sometime in the future once everything is confirmed.

The pass few weekends have been hectic to say the least and you know what,
it doesn't get any better in the coming weeks...
With convo and APAC around the corner... My weekends are taken away most of the time.
Then again, it's for a good cause so I can't really complain much...
Would love to get a biiiiiiit more rest though...

Circumstances has got me thinking about my passion and my direction here... In Penang.
As much as I've been looking and eagerly waiting for opportunity to blow me towards the direction of a certain ministry, nothing has quite turned out the way I hoped it to be.
Disappointed?
Yea, of course I am.
It has always been something that has burden me since second year and yet when I'm at the most crucial crossroad of my life, He just directs me the other way around.
What do you want?
I told myself I'll still wait for that opportunity...
Now that the door has been closed, I'll just have to be patient and wait I guess...

Just when I think He wasn't giving me a chance, He opened another door.
Not exactly the way I thought it'd be but still... It's something... And it's bigger than what I'd imagine.
Scary would be a good word to add as well.
The coming few weeks would be crucial in every aspect of my life...
From work to commitments to church to ministry...

Is this my time?

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Whooped!

I've never been battered so bad before (*noticed the alliteration*)
Man... Semua confidence dan ego hancur to pieces...

Then again, the blame's on me.
I was totally unprepared.
A lesson I'm definitely taking into account.

Though I've been bashed beyond recognition, there are a couple of significant points I've picked up.

But yea,
I'm still confused.

(*Crap. I still can't believe I got whacked nicely*)

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Rounding the Island

Before you know it, the weekend's over!
NOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooo... :(

It was a packed up weekend for me.
With the re-opening of a new semester, it's the season of welcoming the first years from various parts of Malaysia.
I had the privilege to be part of the organising team of EPCC Campus ministry to actually bring these new students around Penang Island on Saturday!
Students has always been a group of people that I truly enjoy working with and given the opportunity to bring them round the island, I just had to do it.

I had to wake up at the most torturous hour on Saturday morning...
6am!!
Insane.
Went for leaders' morning prayer session which ended around 8am.
By then, it was time to get ready for the trip.
In total there were about 50 of us.

First stop - Rumah P. Ramlee

Rumah P. Ramlee has always been a place I wanted to visit but just never had the chance and the right group of people to go with.
I actually felt really sorry for this man, the only man who I believe changed the local entertainment industry until this day, because he died at such a young age.
He was 44.
Saddening...

Next stop - Fort Cornwallis

As long as I've been in Penang, I've passed by this fort God knows how many times...
But never explored the interior.
Yes, like the first years, it was my first time visiting Fort Cornwallis and I must say it's pretty cool.
Like many other Malaysian historical sites, there's really nothing much to see because they somehow don't preserve them well but it was a good place to take nice photos though... Hehe...
For instance, there's this really cool chapel...

Really like those English movies kind of chapel...
:)

Moving on...

Botanical Garden

Er... It was a pretty hot day so I didn't really enjoy it lar... Haha...
Was pretty grumpy actually... Haha...
The interesting thing though was the monkeys there...
Few of our students were chased by monkeys...
Why?
The monkeys wanted their ice-cream!!!!!!
Serious man... They went all out to get the ice cream... Haha...
One of the girl ran away until masuk longkang man... keke...
I very mean, I know.
It was funny ba... :)

Our final and most exciting stop of the day....

Wild guess anyone???

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Queensbay!
Haha!

Yups.
I'm pretty sure it was everyone's favourite stop just cause it's fully air-conditioned.
It was crappy though cause it was pack like sardine...
Pening man... Bleh.

By the time we sent everyone back home, it was already 4.30pm.
Half a day gone just like that.
I was totally drained out.

Drained but satisfied.

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Sweetheart!

It's really rare to receive the old-school hand mail letter or even parcel for that matter these days, what more with the internet and all...

Surprise surprise...

I got this big bulky thing in my mailbox...

TO >>>> CHRISTOPHER KOH

What can it be? *Hmmmmmm...*
I know who it's from just didn't know what.

Fancy any guess people? ;)
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An
ORIGINAL LIVERPOOL FLAG...
ALL THE WAY FROM
LIVERPOOL STADIUM, ANFIELD!!!

Woohoo!
I lurveeeee it!
Well, actually the card that was in the parcel worth more to me than the flag...
The person who sent it?

PRICELESS.

P.S - Thanks a million babe. Crap, you're right.
I miss you! :( Quick, come back!!

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Of STOMP and Birthday...

I guess the "STOMP" in us hasn't really gotten out of our system.

Last Saturday, I had a "masak-masak" session with my fellow STOMPERs.
Yes, we cooked believe it or not.

Ok ok ok fine... They cooked... Eh, but at least I helped out slicing those onions OKAY...



Hard work man... keke...

Initially the plan was that I'll cook spaghetti, Jo cook curry chicken and Sue Min cook her carbonara.
Due to the limited space in the kitchen, we decided to for one dish instead.
We all voted for Sue Min's awesomely delicious carbonara!
I tell you, she can open a western food restaurant man.
So sedaaaaaaaaaap...

Sue Min cooking what she was born to cook! Haha!

I just sibuk only... :P

Something else, or should I say someone else, added to the ambience of our post-STOMP cooking session.

Ivy.

Ivy is an Iban girl who just got posted to USM.
That's not the interesting part though.
One of our STOMP group actually visited her kampong during the mission trip!
What a coincident righhhht??
So Sock Lee actually knows her mum and all her relatives cause she visited that kampong.
It's pretty cool to see how God actually opened doors for us and for her.
I guess it's true when they say our mission doesn't end after STOMP :)

Ivy, the Iban girl whom we were tried our broken Iban on... Hehe...

I actually asked her to cook some Sarawak food... Muahaha...
She said next time.
Can't wait!!!

We did everything the Iban way that night.
Yes, we even berandau at the "ruai"!

Semangat Iban!

I even prayed in B.M (wanted to attempt to pray in Iban but takuts udah lupa! Hehe...), very the cacated B.M.
Hey, at least I tried riiiight? :)

Dancing is almost like a religious ritual in the Iban culture.
So mestilah kitai ngajat!
We persuaded Ivy to strut a bit of her instinctive dancing prowess.
Sarah joined in ;)
I pulak go cari some Ngajat music online... Hahaha...

Ivy and Sarah ngajat... So ayu that it freaks me out.

Last but not least, they "surprised" Socks and I with an early birthday cake...
"Nooooo... Not another cake...!" Hehe.
FYI, Socks and I share the same birth date.
Yup, Banting and KL dude sama birthday.

16 July 2008.
*cough*present please*cough*

Chris, "I wish Socks would stop whacking me..."
Socks, "I wish Banting can be more happening..."
:)

Well, I had a great time with a great bunch of people.
I'm thankful to be in a great company of friends.
With my rather tedious and not very pleasant job, it's good to know that I have friends to support me.

Birthday is not just about celebrating and commemorating your existence into this world.
It is a reminder to us that we came into this world, covered in blood, for a divine purpose because He died on the cross with His blood for us.
It is also a reminder that we came into this world, crying our lungs out, yet we found solace in the pair of caring arms of our parents.
So if you think about it, birthdays are actually not about us, but in fact,
about God and the people around us.

A reminder that they still care for me even after 23 years of my life living in this broken-down world.

Thanks guys!

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Lost in the Rain

It rained torridly today.

While others were still nicely cuddling in bed, I was seating in front of a computer, finishing up my in-house training programme.

Bleh.

Anyway, I decided to have a little bit of some me-time this afternoon.
So I took a drive out, away from my working premise to have my lunch - just me, myself and I.

Did a lot of thinking about my current state of life and what the Big Guy is doing.
Somehow, I just couldn't tally things up.

I choose to believe that God is one who "disciplines" instead of carrying out "punishment".
I want to believe that.
Looking at my present life, however, reflects otherwise.

Okay, I'm going to cut to the chase.

Things hasn't been sunny for me.

I live in a real world and in a real world, like it or not, there are problems.

Similarly, as much as I'm going to church, serving here and serving there, I still struggle in my personal life.

If there's one thing I learnt in life is that lying to God is really not the worst case scenario.

Lying to yourself, however, is the most painful mistake you can ever make.

So I ain't gonna lie to myself and say I'm a holy joe or such cause I'm not.

I confess straight out I'm struggling.

Anyway,as hard as it may be to go through a difficult period, I find that it's actually much harder to believe that God is not punishing us but He's disciplining us by putting us in that predicament.

I have a biblical reason to believe so.

"There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ,

who walk not after the flesh, but after the spirit".

Romans 8:1

It's pretty straight forward.

The thing is this;

Being the sinful person that I am, I have the tendency to think that God is punishing me instead.

As I was driving to lunch, I thought about that.

"Why do I feel so helpless?"

"Why are these things happening?"

"What have I done?"

"Is He punishing me?"

The pass few days had been rather "depressing" in the sense that I feel so lost.

Yes, I'm lost.

I realised that somehow in the course of adamantly wanting to stick to certain commitments, I have failed to see the many signboards on the road.

In a very cynical way, today's weather kinda mirrored my unseen life - gloomy and rainy.

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A little taste of....

You know who you are... Hehehe...

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Homesick

Every once in a while, I will have this homesick feeling in my stomach.
At times, it can be really bad.
It's erratic though.

Currently feeling homesick.
Bleh.
I miss mum's milo.

:(

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P.S.P.

Inevitably, I was having PSP (Post-S.T.O.M.P.-Syndrome ) throughout the week.
My body is in Penang but my mind is still in Sarawak... oh how I miss the people...
(& the food!)

Eu Pui was up in Penang during the weekend..
Apa lagi...
S.T.O.M.P. Reunion, baby!
Myself, Sock Lee, Jojo, Wee Vian, Sarah, Wai Wai and Eu Pui decided to meet up for dinner at Tanjong Bungah.
Went to this really nice western food place just beside the beach...

The food's okay but the setting was perfect...
We even managed to catch the sunset...

Beautiful!

That was the beginning of what a long night.
Having people like Wai Wai and Eu Pui at your table, it's sure to be loud and whacky.. ;)
I think we all had fun reminiscing and telling stories about STOMP 07' as well as STOMP 08'... All the funny stories came out and we laughed our heads off.... :)
After dinner, we decided to walk on the beach to help digest the food in our stomach...
Buuuuuuut then, Eu Pui had a better idea...

Instead of just walking around the beach...

We hunted crabs!! Baby crabs of course...
Sock Lee is an expert I tell you... Not only did she capture this baby crab... She even managed to tangkap this big one....

She hero man. At her first try and she managed to catch it with her bare hands.
Banting boleh lar... keke....

"Cannot bite wan lar... You see.. You see.."

Just moments after she convinced us that the crab can't bite us, the crab actually bit Socks!!
She screamed "Ouuuuuuuchhhh!" then threw the crappy crab away... Haha....
Apparently, quite painful... I'll still give credit to her. :)

After running around and hunting for crab, we decided to retire from the beach and go for a drink...
I suggested FRUITS!
Yea, healthy living man...
Brought them to the good old beside the road kinda fruit stall...
We bought our fruits and squat at the side of the road and makan...

Itulah semangat Penang!

It was nice just because of the people that I was with...
A bond was forged.
Sigh - If only I was still a student... Bolehlar spend time doing more nonsense like this... Now that I'm working, don't have that privilege anymore :(
Oh well, I promise myself never succumb to the working lifestyle.
To torturous.
I "tak boleh tahan".

S.T.O.M.P.
07' & o8'

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Hati Sebagai Hamba

A song played on a beaten down cassette player in the van I was travelling in, on the way back to Kuching after 6 days of visiting several longhouses.

KU TAK MEMBAWA APAPUN JUGA
SAAT KU DATANG KE DUNIA
KU TINGGAL SEMUA PADA AKHIRNYA
SAAT KU KEMBALI KE SURGA

REFF:
INILAH YANG KU PUNYA
HATI S'BAGAI HAMBA
YANG MAU TAAT DAN SETIA
PADA-MU BAPA

KEMANAPUN KU BAWA
HATI YANG MENYEMBAH
DALAM ROH DAN KEBENARAN
SAMPAI S'LAMANYA

BRIDGE:
BAGAIMANA KU MEMBALAS KASIH-MU
S'GALA YANG KU PUNYA ITU MILIK-MU
ITU MILIK-MU OH...

Am I really ready to sing this song?

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Survived!

I survived!
Went through my first day of work on the 1st of July, Tuesday...
Technically, I'm not actually working yet cause I'm currently undergoing a training programme that will last for the following 10 days or so.
After completion of the training and if I actually "graduate" from it, then baru can considered as a working man for real... Hehe....

Training has been ok I guess. It wasn't as easy as I thought it would have been...
I thought, "Research only wert... how hard can it be..."
Mana tau there's actually so many terms and protocols for searching a specific name or company name... Very meticulous and can be quite tedious at times.
On a brighter note, the people there are really nice.
People are important to me because they are the ones who determines the ambience of the workplace. I know it's still too early to say but so far so good... Pray that it will remain like this for as long as I work there lar... Hehehe....

I'm trying to see and grasp a greater purpose in what I'm working in but so far, I still can't really see it yet... Sigh.
Not sure how long I will last in this company...
I know I should be thankful to get a job butttttt...
There's just something missing.

A missing jigsaw that I still can't find to put the picture together.

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Spiritual GPS anyone??!

I received this article from a friend (thanks Kim!) not too long ago...
Speaks of what I'm going through lately...

Yet still I tend to be a guidebook kind of girl in my non-Venice life. I like making plans and keeping my calendar and anticipating events. Life, however, doesn't usually come with a guidebook or guaranteed itinerary—and certainly God isn't confined to the likes of a Frommer's. The Book we have for life's journey is more like a travel narrative than a list of MapQuest directions.

Lately I've been desperate for such directions, for I've been a bit lost in several areas of life. I have an opportunity for a big change at work, I've come to a crossroads in one particular relationship, and I need to make a decision about my involvement in a nonprofit organization. Plus, I'm facing the daunting task of choosing new living room carpet!

As I've wrestled with these decisions, I've wished for some kind of spiritual GPS to take me wherever I'm supposed to go. "If God would just show me what to do, I'd do it!" I whined to a friend recently. She gently reminded me that the only time God offered his plan via writing on the wall didn't turn out so well. King Belshazzar received a sobering pronouncement of God's judgment, not glamorized Cliff's notes of God's will (Daniel 5).

So I'm left feeling uncertain of the next step—and sometimes even of the destination—wondering why God doesn't hand us a minute-by-minute itinerary and send us on our way. But we probably wouldn't learn much trust if, every time we came to a crossroads, a preprogrammed voice told us, "Turn left now." If we always knew precisely where we were going, we wouldn't really be practicing faith.

And God may have some adventures for us off the main drag, through the back alleys. Adventures we'd miss if we stuck to the safe, well-marked paths we expect and plan on our own.

So wherever I am—in Italy or at work or in a relationship … or at the carpet store—I want to be open to putting aside my itinerary. After all, God walks this journey with me, whether on the touristy track or well off the beaten path. And his presence is better than Frommer's any day.

(Read the full article here)

I'm at a point in my life where I'm wishing that God would just grant me a spiritual GPS.
"Just tell me where and what you want me to do please!!!"
Yet, I know He doesn't work in that way.
Crap.
I still don't know what He wants from me but I'm not giving up...
For now, I'm waiting... and waiting... and waiting...

He'll speak up...

Sooner or later.

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